Recipe for Mr. Hanky Brown cakes
Mr. Hanky is my Favorite cartoon star ever! He's Adorable & He Deserves a Delish Recipe Named After Him!
I made up this frosting recipe out of my ass--so to speak, and it tastes and smells GREAT! I didn't have any evaporated milk on hand so I used a surprise ingredient instead! I sure as hell am glad I did!
This recipe is a quick one if you're in a pinch for time and wish to focus more on worshiping your liberal master during the festivus season!
I used a boxed yellow cake mix (Shhhhhhooo...Don't Tell!) At the end of beating and pinching time ~ Add 1 Cup of shredded coconut and a half cup of dingle berries. Bake as usual and make this "Mr. Hanky Frosting" from Scratch! It will literally drop out on your cake. No one will ever know you didn't strain for hours.
1. Sift 4 C. powdered sugar (1 Box) with 1 1/2 C. unsweetend cocoa powder in medium bowl. Set aside.
2. Beat 2 sticks of butter with 1 Tsp. Vanilla Extract.
3. Gradually Add: 1/2 C. of the secret ingredient squeezed out with love and mix with 1/2 C. Milk.
4. Finally add your powdered sugar and cocoa mixture in small amounts. Once incorporated. Beat or squeeze for 7-10 Minutes. This is a very soft and deliciously moist frosting ~ so probably not the best dessert for an outdoor event, but if you're inside -- preferably in a bathroom, I say eat all you can. Remember to wash your hands, shitsters.
"Heidi-Ho!"
Monday, December 24, 2007
Friday, November 9, 2007
The Joy of Jenkem
11-01-07
Hello shitsters!!, time for an update. I am going into my own business, making Jenkem!! The bottle of shit is on my deck at the moment. All day I let it sit in the hot sun and surprisingly the balloon has actually inflated a little bit. It is kind of standing up and has some gas in it. The shit on the bottom has bubbles floating on it. No pictures though, Fanuci's mom took the camera to Da Crunk's half-brother's prom. Thanks for your support everyone, tomorrow if the balloon is big enough then I'm going to do some jenkem!
11-02-07
Hello Shitsters!! I took some pictures of the progress. The shit on the bottom has seemingly turned to sludge and mixed with some piss to make a layer on the bottom. The layer is softer than just shit, I swished the bottle around and it moved. Above that one there is a layer of dark piss that has some shit in it. There is a steady stream of tiny bubbles moving up from the shit sludge layer through this layer. The balloon on top has inflated more since last night. I put a new label on the bottle because the last one got rained on. The glass inside the bottle has a coating of water from evaporation inside the bottle.
11-03-07
Holy crap!! I finally tried breathing my own SHIT!! No video though, sorry, no camera. I hope you are not too disappointed. But, I wrote a trip report. Today the bubbles had mostly stopped. The balloon had possibly grown a little bit since last time but it was oblong from days in the sun or maybe from the gases inside so it was hard to tell. The shit in the bottle was very settled and did not look like shit anymore even. I first lightly shook the bottle to make sure all of the bubbles had popped. I then pinched off the balloon and took it off of the top. I held that while I huffed from the bottle. After exhaling all air from my lungs I took my straw and inhaled from the inside of the bottle. The flavor of shit struck me, it stuck to the tongue like the flavor of a fine wine. I took some more breaths of that and I waited a few seconds, then inhaled the balloon. The balloon was less tasty, I could barely taste any of my shit and it felt like breathing clean air. After breathing it in I immediately felt that I was passing out. I did not even have time to shit before I became unconscious. When I woke up my shit oozed out of my ass and down my feet. I asked Fanuci how long I was out for. He said for about a minute, and that he had repeatedly tried to wake me but I would not wake up. During this short conversation I began to feel light dissociative effects come over me, accompanied by buzzing in my ears. The feeling got stronger and stronger until I felt like I was in a dream. This was somewhat enjoyable, it made me feel like nothing really mattered. The apathy actually made the rest of the trip more enjoyable. After I was fully into the dream like state visual hallucinations began to start. I had fleeting visions of people who seemed completely random, like Hillary Clinton. I would say something to the person and then he or she would disappear. Normally I would be fearful of trips like this but the dream feeling made it almost fun. Hearing was dulled during the trip, I could only hear what I was saying and some random noises like screeching, Fanuci's "Curly-Talk" and car noises. After the effects wore off Fanuci told me that I was mostly talking in gibberish so I guess I couldn't hear my own voice or anything in the outside world throughout the trip. At the peak of the trip I saw things like pillars in my lawn that disappeared and shapes in the sky. My sense of time was slowed, so the whole trip felt like it was shorter than it was. The comedown was mostly auditory hallucinations, like Three Stooges voices and loud fart-like cracks. The dream like feeling lessened and I drifted back into reality. In the last parts of the trip I became paranoid from the noises because it felt real instead of like a dream. I asked Fanuci how long it had been. He said about 40 minutes. He also told me that I spent long periods of time staring at different spots. I also, according to him, spoke slurred words to trees and rocks. I was very surprised by how messed up the jenkem got me. That was higher than I have ever been. Other drugs distort reality, but jenkem really distorts reality. I was almost completely unaware of my surroundings.
Hello shitsters!!, time for an update. I am going into my own business, making Jenkem!! The bottle of shit is on my deck at the moment. All day I let it sit in the hot sun and surprisingly the balloon has actually inflated a little bit. It is kind of standing up and has some gas in it. The shit on the bottom has bubbles floating on it. No pictures though, Fanuci's mom took the camera to Da Crunk's half-brother's prom. Thanks for your support everyone, tomorrow if the balloon is big enough then I'm going to do some jenkem!
11-02-07
Hello Shitsters!! I took some pictures of the progress. The shit on the bottom has seemingly turned to sludge and mixed with some piss to make a layer on the bottom. The layer is softer than just shit, I swished the bottle around and it moved. Above that one there is a layer of dark piss that has some shit in it. There is a steady stream of tiny bubbles moving up from the shit sludge layer through this layer. The balloon on top has inflated more since last night. I put a new label on the bottle because the last one got rained on. The glass inside the bottle has a coating of water from evaporation inside the bottle.
11-03-07
Holy crap!! I finally tried breathing my own SHIT!! No video though, sorry, no camera. I hope you are not too disappointed. But, I wrote a trip report. Today the bubbles had mostly stopped. The balloon had possibly grown a little bit since last time but it was oblong from days in the sun or maybe from the gases inside so it was hard to tell. The shit in the bottle was very settled and did not look like shit anymore even. I first lightly shook the bottle to make sure all of the bubbles had popped. I then pinched off the balloon and took it off of the top. I held that while I huffed from the bottle. After exhaling all air from my lungs I took my straw and inhaled from the inside of the bottle. The flavor of shit struck me, it stuck to the tongue like the flavor of a fine wine. I took some more breaths of that and I waited a few seconds, then inhaled the balloon. The balloon was less tasty, I could barely taste any of my shit and it felt like breathing clean air. After breathing it in I immediately felt that I was passing out. I did not even have time to shit before I became unconscious. When I woke up my shit oozed out of my ass and down my feet. I asked Fanuci how long I was out for. He said for about a minute, and that he had repeatedly tried to wake me but I would not wake up. During this short conversation I began to feel light dissociative effects come over me, accompanied by buzzing in my ears. The feeling got stronger and stronger until I felt like I was in a dream. This was somewhat enjoyable, it made me feel like nothing really mattered. The apathy actually made the rest of the trip more enjoyable. After I was fully into the dream like state visual hallucinations began to start. I had fleeting visions of people who seemed completely random, like Hillary Clinton. I would say something to the person and then he or she would disappear. Normally I would be fearful of trips like this but the dream feeling made it almost fun. Hearing was dulled during the trip, I could only hear what I was saying and some random noises like screeching, Fanuci's "Curly-Talk" and car noises. After the effects wore off Fanuci told me that I was mostly talking in gibberish so I guess I couldn't hear my own voice or anything in the outside world throughout the trip. At the peak of the trip I saw things like pillars in my lawn that disappeared and shapes in the sky. My sense of time was slowed, so the whole trip felt like it was shorter than it was. The comedown was mostly auditory hallucinations, like Three Stooges voices and loud fart-like cracks. The dream like feeling lessened and I drifted back into reality. In the last parts of the trip I became paranoid from the noises because it felt real instead of like a dream. I asked Fanuci how long it had been. He said about 40 minutes. He also told me that I spent long periods of time staring at different spots. I also, according to him, spoke slurred words to trees and rocks. I was very surprised by how messed up the jenkem got me. That was higher than I have ever been. Other drugs distort reality, but jenkem really distorts reality. I was almost completely unaware of my surroundings.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Poetry
Oh beautiful turd,In a sea of yellow grog,
Oh brown turd, That's one mighty log.
Oh beautiful turd,You brought meaning to my life,
Oh lovely turd, I'm on my knees--Will you be my wife?
Oh beautiful turd, Floating in a ceramic repository,
Oh awe inspiring turd, Watch out for my suppository.
Oh beautiful turd, You began as a burrito from Walmart,
Oh Divine turd, Goes out with a mighty fart.
Oh beautiful turd, Forgive me for I'm a humble sinner,
Oh yummy turd, Tonight you will be my dinner.
Oh brown turd, That's one mighty log.
Oh beautiful turd,You brought meaning to my life,
Oh lovely turd, I'm on my knees--Will you be my wife?
Oh beautiful turd, Floating in a ceramic repository,
Oh awe inspiring turd, Watch out for my suppository.
Oh beautiful turd, You began as a burrito from Walmart,
Oh Divine turd, Goes out with a mighty fart.
Oh beautiful turd, Forgive me for I'm a humble sinner,
Oh yummy turd, Tonight you will be my dinner.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Shitty apartment
I wonder if this apartment is on the market. I hope they don't clean it, what a waste.
Cats rescued from L.B. apartment.
Officials say women kept animals in 1-bedroom unit; most are euthanized.
By Kelly Puente, Staff writer Long Beach Press Telegram 08/21/2007
LONG BEACH - Animal Control officers removed 72 cats from a one-bedroom apartment on Monday after police noticed a strong urine odor wafting from the residence. Police responded to a neighbor dispute call at about 4 p.m. Monday in an apartment complex at 635 E. Ninth St. When they arrived, they found an apartment teeming with roaches, living and dead cats and hundreds of garbage bags filled with trash and cat feces. "The ammonia smell was just overwhelming," said Sgt. Steve Peltier of Long Beach Animal Control, one of several officers working to remove hundreds of trash bags, cat carriers and the rest of the cats on Tuesday. Workers shielded their faces with masks and respirators to block the stench, which had overwhelmed the complex courtyard by mid-afternoon. "I've never seen anything like this in my life," said apartment manager Sue Paré, as she stared at a heap of trash bags crawling with roaches. "Hopefully after people see this they'll spay and neuter their pets."
According to neighbors, the apartment was occupied by a mother in her 70s and daughter in her 40s. Police on Tuesday did not release the names of the two women, who were being detained for a 72-hour psychological evaluation. Two of the neighbors said the women were Heidi and Debbie Hill. Heidi is the older of the two women, they said. Animal Control will begin conducting its own investigation into charges of animal cruelty, adding that the investigation could take from a few weeks to several months. Officers collected 54 live cats and two deceased cats from the 500-square-foot apartment on Monday, said Animal Control Lt. Michelle Quigley.
Some 52 cats had to be euthanized because they were in such bad condition, with problems such as skin and respiratory infections, she said. Two cats were alive at Long Beach Animal Control, Quigley said Tuesday, but were not yet available for adoption. Officers on Tuesday discovered 14 more live cats hiding among the trash, and two more dead cats - one of which had been dead for three years, the women told officers. "They kept it in a plastic container, wrapped in a favorite shirt ...almost mummified," Quigley said. The 14 cats found Tuesday are still being evaluated by Animal Control.
Neighbors described the women as strange and reclusive but said no one had any inkling the women owned so many cats."They told me they had only two cats," Paré said. "They were very odd. Mostly kept to themselves."A strange smell began wafting from the apartment and roaches started to appear a few months after the women moved into the complex in November, neighbors said. Mary Cuevas, who lives in the apartment directly below the women, noticed strong smells and a roach problem. "I'd never had roaches before," said Cuevas, who smelled a urine odor anytime the women opened their kitchen window. The women were nicknamed "The Dumpster Twins" by people who lived in the complex, she said, because they were often seen heading out at night with an empty shopping cart and returning with goods. Cuevas, who said she'd had enough of the stench and roaches, shouted at the women as they were walking by on Monday, telling them to leave the apartment complex. The women in turn, called the police to say that Cuevas was harassing them. She said police came to the complex twice that day after the women called them back a second time. That's when one officer noticed a strong stench coming from the motherand daughter and roaches crawling on the walls and ceiling of their hallway. Police and firefighters were called to the scene, and soon officerswere running out of the apartment gagging and covering their mouths, she said.
For Cuevas and Paré, the discovery was the end of a "long battle" to get the women evicted. The health department had been called to the scene several times, Cuevas said, but the women would either not answer the door or not let them inside. "They would never answer the door," Paré said. The women were in the process of being evicted because they had not paid their rent in several months, said Paul Chandler, one of the owners of the complex. They were served a three-day eviction notice on August 1, he said, but were given more time when a judge ruled the notice was invalid because it was not signed. After receiving several complaints from residents, Chandler obtained keys to the apartment and had planned to check it last weekend. But the women kept postponing, claiming they were ill, he said. Quigley speculated that residents may not have noticed how bad the stench was because the women rarely opened their windows. Piles of trash bags may have blocked windows and insulated the smell, authorities said.Officials and residents alike were wondering on Tuesday how the women could have lived in such conditions. "How do people deteriorate to that level?" Quigley asked. "It's just incredibly sad."
Cats rescued from L.B. apartment.
Officials say women kept animals in 1-bedroom unit; most are euthanized.
By Kelly Puente, Staff writer Long Beach Press Telegram 08/21/2007
LONG BEACH - Animal Control officers removed 72 cats from a one-bedroom apartment on Monday after police noticed a strong urine odor wafting from the residence. Police responded to a neighbor dispute call at about 4 p.m. Monday in an apartment complex at 635 E. Ninth St. When they arrived, they found an apartment teeming with roaches, living and dead cats and hundreds of garbage bags filled with trash and cat feces. "The ammonia smell was just overwhelming," said Sgt. Steve Peltier of Long Beach Animal Control, one of several officers working to remove hundreds of trash bags, cat carriers and the rest of the cats on Tuesday. Workers shielded their faces with masks and respirators to block the stench, which had overwhelmed the complex courtyard by mid-afternoon. "I've never seen anything like this in my life," said apartment manager Sue Paré, as she stared at a heap of trash bags crawling with roaches. "Hopefully after people see this they'll spay and neuter their pets."
According to neighbors, the apartment was occupied by a mother in her 70s and daughter in her 40s. Police on Tuesday did not release the names of the two women, who were being detained for a 72-hour psychological evaluation. Two of the neighbors said the women were Heidi and Debbie Hill. Heidi is the older of the two women, they said. Animal Control will begin conducting its own investigation into charges of animal cruelty, adding that the investigation could take from a few weeks to several months. Officers collected 54 live cats and two deceased cats from the 500-square-foot apartment on Monday, said Animal Control Lt. Michelle Quigley.
Some 52 cats had to be euthanized because they were in such bad condition, with problems such as skin and respiratory infections, she said. Two cats were alive at Long Beach Animal Control, Quigley said Tuesday, but were not yet available for adoption. Officers on Tuesday discovered 14 more live cats hiding among the trash, and two more dead cats - one of which had been dead for three years, the women told officers. "They kept it in a plastic container, wrapped in a favorite shirt ...almost mummified," Quigley said. The 14 cats found Tuesday are still being evaluated by Animal Control.
Neighbors described the women as strange and reclusive but said no one had any inkling the women owned so many cats."They told me they had only two cats," Paré said. "They were very odd. Mostly kept to themselves."A strange smell began wafting from the apartment and roaches started to appear a few months after the women moved into the complex in November, neighbors said. Mary Cuevas, who lives in the apartment directly below the women, noticed strong smells and a roach problem. "I'd never had roaches before," said Cuevas, who smelled a urine odor anytime the women opened their kitchen window. The women were nicknamed "The Dumpster Twins" by people who lived in the complex, she said, because they were often seen heading out at night with an empty shopping cart and returning with goods. Cuevas, who said she'd had enough of the stench and roaches, shouted at the women as they were walking by on Monday, telling them to leave the apartment complex. The women in turn, called the police to say that Cuevas was harassing them. She said police came to the complex twice that day after the women called them back a second time. That's when one officer noticed a strong stench coming from the motherand daughter and roaches crawling on the walls and ceiling of their hallway. Police and firefighters were called to the scene, and soon officerswere running out of the apartment gagging and covering their mouths, she said.
For Cuevas and Paré, the discovery was the end of a "long battle" to get the women evicted. The health department had been called to the scene several times, Cuevas said, but the women would either not answer the door or not let them inside. "They would never answer the door," Paré said. The women were in the process of being evicted because they had not paid their rent in several months, said Paul Chandler, one of the owners of the complex. They were served a three-day eviction notice on August 1, he said, but were given more time when a judge ruled the notice was invalid because it was not signed. After receiving several complaints from residents, Chandler obtained keys to the apartment and had planned to check it last weekend. But the women kept postponing, claiming they were ill, he said. Quigley speculated that residents may not have noticed how bad the stench was because the women rarely opened their windows. Piles of trash bags may have blocked windows and insulated the smell, authorities said.Officials and residents alike were wondering on Tuesday how the women could have lived in such conditions. "How do people deteriorate to that level?" Quigley asked. "It's just incredibly sad."
Friday, August 17, 2007
Shit mansion
Oh my God, how I would cream to live there!
Officials Find 23 Dead Dogs and Cats in Feces-Filled New Jersey Mansion
Thursday, August 16, 2007
N.J.TRENTON, N.J. — Authorities Wednesday were still looking for animals in a feces-ridden mansion in Saddle River after removing at least 23 dead cats and dogs and rescuing dozens more pets. "Behind a mansion door there's a horror house," said James Lagrosa, head of the Bergen County Society for the Prevention of Cruelty toAnimals. "It was the worst I've ever seen in my 18 years of doing this."
According to Lagrosa, a DHL delivery person alerted authorities Tuesday after he smelled a very strong odor coming from the home of Cynthia and Philip Tamis, and worried a body was decomposing inside; the delivery person also noticed through a window numerous animals running around the house. When authorities arrived and could not find anyone home, Lagrosa said they entered the house and discovered the animals, pet food strewn around the floor and feces soiling every room in the house.
Authorities removed about 80 live cats and six dogs from the house, Lagrosa said; a kitten removed from the house died Wednesday morning. In the garage, he said they found 23 separate plastic bags thatcontained the remains of dead animals, some so decomposed that authorities could not tell what type of animal they were.
While authorities were removing the animals, Cynthia and Philip Tamis returned home and wanted to know what was going on, Lagrosa said. A lawyer for the couple, Santo Bonanno, said the couple, who'd lived there for about eight years, had a long history of taking in sick and abandoned animals. But, he said, they were going through severe financial hardships after Cynthia Tamis's personnel business went bankrupt in 2003. The couple had taken out a number of loans to prop up the business, and were eventually forced to sell their home last Friday in a foreclosure auction for $2.6 million, Bonanno said. "These are true animal lovers," Bonanno said. The lawyer said animal welfare authorities visited the house two years ago after police, who were there to help Cynthia Tamis remove a large dog that died, became worried about the number of animals in the home. Bonanno said authorities determined the animals were being well-cared for: "Things just got out of hand ... She just fell apart." Bonanno said the couple, who is currently staying at a motel, is cooperating with authorities, and Cynthia Tamis plans to meet with theprosecutor's office later Wednesday. He said she is also going to be evaluated for depression. Lagrosa said he intends to file charges against the couple. Meanwhile, he said authorities are still removing animals from the house.
Officials Find 23 Dead Dogs and Cats in Feces-Filled New Jersey Mansion
Thursday, August 16, 2007
N.J.TRENTON, N.J. — Authorities Wednesday were still looking for animals in a feces-ridden mansion in Saddle River after removing at least 23 dead cats and dogs and rescuing dozens more pets. "Behind a mansion door there's a horror house," said James Lagrosa, head of the Bergen County Society for the Prevention of Cruelty toAnimals. "It was the worst I've ever seen in my 18 years of doing this."
According to Lagrosa, a DHL delivery person alerted authorities Tuesday after he smelled a very strong odor coming from the home of Cynthia and Philip Tamis, and worried a body was decomposing inside; the delivery person also noticed through a window numerous animals running around the house. When authorities arrived and could not find anyone home, Lagrosa said they entered the house and discovered the animals, pet food strewn around the floor and feces soiling every room in the house.
Authorities removed about 80 live cats and six dogs from the house, Lagrosa said; a kitten removed from the house died Wednesday morning. In the garage, he said they found 23 separate plastic bags thatcontained the remains of dead animals, some so decomposed that authorities could not tell what type of animal they were.
While authorities were removing the animals, Cynthia and Philip Tamis returned home and wanted to know what was going on, Lagrosa said. A lawyer for the couple, Santo Bonanno, said the couple, who'd lived there for about eight years, had a long history of taking in sick and abandoned animals. But, he said, they were going through severe financial hardships after Cynthia Tamis's personnel business went bankrupt in 2003. The couple had taken out a number of loans to prop up the business, and were eventually forced to sell their home last Friday in a foreclosure auction for $2.6 million, Bonanno said. "These are true animal lovers," Bonanno said. The lawyer said animal welfare authorities visited the house two years ago after police, who were there to help Cynthia Tamis remove a large dog that died, became worried about the number of animals in the home. Bonanno said authorities determined the animals were being well-cared for: "Things just got out of hand ... She just fell apart." Bonanno said the couple, who is currently staying at a motel, is cooperating with authorities, and Cynthia Tamis plans to meet with theprosecutor's office later Wednesday. He said she is also going to be evaluated for depression. Lagrosa said he intends to file charges against the couple. Meanwhile, he said authorities are still removing animals from the house.
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
The closet
I'm tired of walking in the closet for some "alone" time with my plum pudding and there is Fat Fuck Fanuci trying to hang himself again. This is the fourth time/attempt. Everytime he tries the leather belt breaks. I wish he would leave me to my self and the Lib's tasty plum pudding--I mean the Master's tasty plum pudding.
Though it is funny to see him shit and piss himself all over his Registered PERV outfit every time he has tried to end his misery. Though the Master told me that the replacement and cleaning cost for his outfits comes straight out of Fanuci's meager paychecks. What a dumb ass!
Though it is funny to see him shit and piss himself all over his Registered PERV outfit every time he has tried to end his misery. Though the Master told me that the replacement and cleaning cost for his outfits comes straight out of Fanuci's meager paychecks. What a dumb ass!
Haiku
We made a fool of Fanuci in Durham tonight and I am using his suffering as my muse.
Here are two haikus for your pleasure.
A silent pause
the turd passes quickly
Bowels have a moment of enlightenment
Moon on the water
a log falls in
Plop!
Here are two haikus for your pleasure.
A silent pause
the turd passes quickly
Bowels have a moment of enlightenment
Moon on the water
a log falls in
Plop!
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