Below are excerpts from the handbook that the Master wrote. All members of Frustrated Inc must use this as a guide when humiliating that fat fuck, Fanuci. It's available for sale at the Braddock County Public Library. ENJOY!!!
Pgs. 120-127
*Make Fanuci give Kelly Millis a full body or prostate massage
*Make Fanuci hand wash the Turd's diaper.
*Make Fanuci polish Rev. Dr. Curtis's shoes with his tongue.
*Dress Fanuci up like the slut that he is
*Take pictures/video of Fanuci shitting or when he's dressed as a girl
*When you go to the Braddock County Public Library, order Fanuci to tie himself up, be naked or dressed up as a girl and be kneeling at the door for when you arrive. Give him plenty of chores to do while you're gone
*Make Fanuci think of a new way for you to humiliate him.
Punish him if you don't think it's good enough.
------------------------- Pgs. 547-559, If Fanuci must be punished for failure to be humiliated properly:
*Spank or whip him
*Tie him in an uncomfortable position.
*Hog tie Fanuci with his wrists and ankles together
*Place Fanuci in a wheel-barrow with his knees pulled up to his shoulders good for spanking and everything is exposed and vulnerable.
*Make Fanuci wear a chastity belt.
*Attach clothes pins to his nipples, twist, then quickly pull off.
*Put a butt plug in Fanuci's ass. Or get out the strap-on.
*Double up Fanuci's domestic chores, make them more difficult: tie Fanuci's hands; make the fat fuck use a toothbrush to clean the toilet, tie his ankles with a short chain and make him wear extra high heels.
*Put Ben-gay or icy-hot on Fanuci's nipples, then drip candle wax on them.
*Make him do nude exercises (jumping jacks, leg spreads, squats, aerobics...) in the public library.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Friday, May 9, 2008
The Master is Mad
Tuesday night was a terrible night for The Master. We were riding in his stretch Prius when we heard the news that the turd colored one had defeated the Master's immortal beloved, Hillary in North Carolina. I have never seen the Master so enraged. He popped a bunch of Libotines, and some other barbituates and shoved some of the directly into his anus. He ordered the driver to turn the Prius around but as the driver went to do the three point turn a car behind us filled the gap so that we could not back up. The Master was enraged and looked just like the cartoon steam whistles or teapots as they get red hot and blare. He turned red, the purple then just went nuts. He jumped out of the car and went to the car that had blocked us and yanked an old black out of the car and tried to hit him with the Cut and Run but missed. The old colored man started hitting him as the Master yelled "I hate you Uncle Tombama!!!" We finally restrained him and got him back in the car before he hurt himself. What a strange night.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
I did not know that energy and saving the environment could be so
By Nichola Groom
RIVERDALE, California (Reuters) - Imagine a vat of liquid cow manure covering the area of five football fields and 33 feet deep. Meet California's most alternative new energy.
On a dairy farm in the Golden State's agricultural heartland, utility PG&E Corp began on Tuesday producing natural gas derived from manure, in what it hopes will be a new way to power homes with renewable, if not entirely clean, energy.
The Vintage Dairy Biogas Project, the brainchild of life- long dairyman David Albers, aims to provide the natural gas needed to power 1,200 homes a day, Albers said at the facility's inauguration ceremony.
"When most people see a pile of manure, they see a pile of manure. We saw it as an opportunity for farmers, for utilities, and for California," Albers said.
In addition to being a partner in the 5,000-head Vintage Dairy, Albers is also president of BioEnergy Solutions, the company that funded and built the facility which cost millions of dollars. PG&E is simply a customer and the companies declined to give details of project finances.
As cow manure decomposes, it produces methane, a greenhouse gas more potent than carbon dioxide. Scientists say controlling methane emissions from animals such as cows would be a major step in addressing climate change.
Enter the Vintage Dairy project. As luck would have it, methane can be captured and treated to produce renewable gas, and California regulators have directed PG&E and other utilities to make renewable energy at least 20 percent of their electricity supplies by 2010.
PG&E expects to reach 14 percent this year, thanks in small part at least to its partnership with BioEnergy Solutions.
To tap the renewable gas from cow manure, the Vintage Dairy farm first flushes manure into a large, octagonal pit, where it becomes about 99 percent water. It is then pumped into a covered lagoon, first passing through a screen that filters out large solids that eventually become the cows' bedding.
The covered lagoon, or "digester," is the size of nearly five football fields and about 33 feet deep. It is lined with plastic to protect the ground water and the cover, made of high density polyethylene, is held down at the edges by concrete. The digester's cover was sunken into the lagoon on Tuesday, but officials said it would be taut and raised in a few days as the gas collects underneath it.
Weights on top of the digester channel the gas to the small facility where it is "scrubbed" of hydrogen sulfide and carbon dioxide. The end product is "close to 99 percent pure methane" according to BioEnergy Chief Operating Officer Thomas Hintz.
Once it is treated, the gas is injected into PG&E's pipeline, where it will be shipped to a power plant in Northern California.
According to Albers, PG&E and California state officials, biogas is a major opportunity for dairy farmers to make extra revenue while helping the environment.
"There are a lot of lagoons like this in California that don't have lining in them," said James Boyd, commissioner and vice chair of the California Energy Commission. "There is a business case to be made for this ... climate change has really provided the incentive to do this."
Both BioEnergy Solutions and PG&E are actively courting dairy farmers, whose cow manure is now simply being used as fertilizer, allowing the methane to be released into the air as a greenhouse gas.
"With nearly 2 million dairy cows in California, the potential is great," said Roy Kuga, vice president of energy supply for San Fransisco-based PG&E. The company has a partnership with another company, Microgy, which is currently setting up biogas projects at three California dairies.
In practice, however, not every dairy could participate in such a project because some are not located close enough to the necessary gas transmission lines, PG&E officials said.
Still, for now there are plenty of dairies to get on board. A second dairy in Fresno county has already agreed to join the Vintage Dairy project and Albers estimated gas from the two dairies combined could power 2,500 homes a day. The Vintage Dairy facility could accommodate gas from up to two or three more dairies, depending on the size, officials said.
RIVERDALE, California (Reuters) - Imagine a vat of liquid cow manure covering the area of five football fields and 33 feet deep. Meet California's most alternative new energy.
On a dairy farm in the Golden State's agricultural heartland, utility PG&E Corp began on Tuesday producing natural gas derived from manure, in what it hopes will be a new way to power homes with renewable, if not entirely clean, energy.
The Vintage Dairy Biogas Project, the brainchild of life- long dairyman David Albers, aims to provide the natural gas needed to power 1,200 homes a day, Albers said at the facility's inauguration ceremony.
"When most people see a pile of manure, they see a pile of manure. We saw it as an opportunity for farmers, for utilities, and for California," Albers said.
In addition to being a partner in the 5,000-head Vintage Dairy, Albers is also president of BioEnergy Solutions, the company that funded and built the facility which cost millions of dollars. PG&E is simply a customer and the companies declined to give details of project finances.
As cow manure decomposes, it produces methane, a greenhouse gas more potent than carbon dioxide. Scientists say controlling methane emissions from animals such as cows would be a major step in addressing climate change.
Enter the Vintage Dairy project. As luck would have it, methane can be captured and treated to produce renewable gas, and California regulators have directed PG&E and other utilities to make renewable energy at least 20 percent of their electricity supplies by 2010.
PG&E expects to reach 14 percent this year, thanks in small part at least to its partnership with BioEnergy Solutions.
To tap the renewable gas from cow manure, the Vintage Dairy farm first flushes manure into a large, octagonal pit, where it becomes about 99 percent water. It is then pumped into a covered lagoon, first passing through a screen that filters out large solids that eventually become the cows' bedding.
The covered lagoon, or "digester," is the size of nearly five football fields and about 33 feet deep. It is lined with plastic to protect the ground water and the cover, made of high density polyethylene, is held down at the edges by concrete. The digester's cover was sunken into the lagoon on Tuesday, but officials said it would be taut and raised in a few days as the gas collects underneath it.
Weights on top of the digester channel the gas to the small facility where it is "scrubbed" of hydrogen sulfide and carbon dioxide. The end product is "close to 99 percent pure methane" according to BioEnergy Chief Operating Officer Thomas Hintz.
Once it is treated, the gas is injected into PG&E's pipeline, where it will be shipped to a power plant in Northern California.
According to Albers, PG&E and California state officials, biogas is a major opportunity for dairy farmers to make extra revenue while helping the environment.
"There are a lot of lagoons like this in California that don't have lining in them," said James Boyd, commissioner and vice chair of the California Energy Commission. "There is a business case to be made for this ... climate change has really provided the incentive to do this."
Both BioEnergy Solutions and PG&E are actively courting dairy farmers, whose cow manure is now simply being used as fertilizer, allowing the methane to be released into the air as a greenhouse gas.
"With nearly 2 million dairy cows in California, the potential is great," said Roy Kuga, vice president of energy supply for San Fransisco-based PG&E. The company has a partnership with another company, Microgy, which is currently setting up biogas projects at three California dairies.
In practice, however, not every dairy could participate in such a project because some are not located close enough to the necessary gas transmission lines, PG&E officials said.
Still, for now there are plenty of dairies to get on board. A second dairy in Fresno county has already agreed to join the Vintage Dairy project and Albers estimated gas from the two dairies combined could power 2,500 homes a day. The Vintage Dairy facility could accommodate gas from up to two or three more dairies, depending on the size, officials said.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Song
This is my guest song on Da Crunk's album. It's called Shit.
I crap on your chest
You say "Mmm, I'm the best!"
I start stabbing your back pocket
My asshole fires like a rocket
It makes a weird noise
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
We headed down to Mexico
And then I crapped on your ho
I give you the middle finger
You poo in anger
But it makes no difference
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
I see you come to work late
I get nervous so I masterbate
Asshole rashes are contagious
That's really outrageous
You should change your diaper
Come back when it's clean
I want to see your butt cheeks glisten with a sheen
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Squeeze all the juice out
Incase you ate some trout
Keep your distance stanky crotch
I'm watching you like a fox
Nuts scaley like an alligator
I farted in an elevator
Mister please just let me be
Before my pants smell like pee pee
Please get the clue
I got to doo-doo
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
I crap on your chest
You say "Mmm, I'm the best!"
I start stabbing your back pocket
My asshole fires like a rocket
It makes a weird noise
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
We headed down to Mexico
And then I crapped on your ho
I give you the middle finger
You poo in anger
But it makes no difference
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
I see you come to work late
I get nervous so I masterbate
Asshole rashes are contagious
That's really outrageous
You should change your diaper
Come back when it's clean
I want to see your butt cheeks glisten with a sheen
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Squeeze all the juice out
Incase you ate some trout
Keep your distance stanky crotch
I'm watching you like a fox
Nuts scaley like an alligator
I farted in an elevator
Mister please just let me be
Before my pants smell like pee pee
Please get the clue
I got to doo-doo
Cause it smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Smells like shit
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Chocolate Bliss
I was recently asked how do the members of Frustrated Inc celebrate our success? We'll I can't speak for everyone, I only interact directly with the Master and Fanuci. However I can speak for myself. For instance, after I arrived at An Inconvenient Cafe the other night to work a double shift I crapped in my costume and then worked 12 straight hours preparing dessert. Felt so good with that hot gooey pile dumped in this latex and foam.
I wished that I could live with some one (or two or three) in a shanty where there is no toilet so we would have no choice but to dump chocolate goo in our pants or on each other. Or even just use the floor to marinate and then roll around in it. Love to be nasty and dirty and filthy. In fact, everytime i dump i cream myself.
When I am in a particularly good mood, I empty my bowels in my roommate's (Fanuci) Converse sneakers, then go for a walk.
I especially love to spill my stool in my verry tight leather s&m Turd outfit, with cowboy boots, which I wear for Hillary fund-raisers. My leathers are so tight, that I must open my costume first to be able to unload in them. Then I close my leather suit and sit down, all my warm and smelly waste is squisshed between my legs down to the toes in my boots....yummy.
I wished that I could live with some one (or two or three) in a shanty where there is no toilet so we would have no choice but to dump chocolate goo in our pants or on each other. Or even just use the floor to marinate and then roll around in it. Love to be nasty and dirty and filthy. In fact, everytime i dump i cream myself.
When I am in a particularly good mood, I empty my bowels in my roommate's (Fanuci) Converse sneakers, then go for a walk.
I especially love to spill my stool in my verry tight leather s&m Turd outfit, with cowboy boots, which I wear for Hillary fund-raisers. My leathers are so tight, that I must open my costume first to be able to unload in them. Then I close my leather suit and sit down, all my warm and smelly waste is squisshed between my legs down to the toes in my boots....yummy.
Monday, December 24, 2007
Favorite recipes
Recipe for Mr. Hanky Brown cakes
Mr. Hanky is my Favorite cartoon star ever! He's Adorable & He Deserves a Delish Recipe Named After Him!
I made up this frosting recipe out of my ass--so to speak, and it tastes and smells GREAT! I didn't have any evaporated milk on hand so I used a surprise ingredient instead! I sure as hell am glad I did!
This recipe is a quick one if you're in a pinch for time and wish to focus more on worshiping your liberal master during the festivus season!
I used a boxed yellow cake mix (Shhhhhhooo...Don't Tell!) At the end of beating and pinching time ~ Add 1 Cup of shredded coconut and a half cup of dingle berries. Bake as usual and make this "Mr. Hanky Frosting" from Scratch! It will literally drop out on your cake. No one will ever know you didn't strain for hours.
1. Sift 4 C. powdered sugar (1 Box) with 1 1/2 C. unsweetend cocoa powder in medium bowl. Set aside.
2. Beat 2 sticks of butter with 1 Tsp. Vanilla Extract.
3. Gradually Add: 1/2 C. of the secret ingredient squeezed out with love and mix with 1/2 C. Milk.
4. Finally add your powdered sugar and cocoa mixture in small amounts. Once incorporated. Beat or squeeze for 7-10 Minutes. This is a very soft and deliciously moist frosting ~ so probably not the best dessert for an outdoor event, but if you're inside -- preferably in a bathroom, I say eat all you can. Remember to wash your hands, shitsters.
"Heidi-Ho!"
Mr. Hanky is my Favorite cartoon star ever! He's Adorable & He Deserves a Delish Recipe Named After Him!
I made up this frosting recipe out of my ass--so to speak, and it tastes and smells GREAT! I didn't have any evaporated milk on hand so I used a surprise ingredient instead! I sure as hell am glad I did!
This recipe is a quick one if you're in a pinch for time and wish to focus more on worshiping your liberal master during the festivus season!
I used a boxed yellow cake mix (Shhhhhhooo...Don't Tell!) At the end of beating and pinching time ~ Add 1 Cup of shredded coconut and a half cup of dingle berries. Bake as usual and make this "Mr. Hanky Frosting" from Scratch! It will literally drop out on your cake. No one will ever know you didn't strain for hours.
1. Sift 4 C. powdered sugar (1 Box) with 1 1/2 C. unsweetend cocoa powder in medium bowl. Set aside.
2. Beat 2 sticks of butter with 1 Tsp. Vanilla Extract.
3. Gradually Add: 1/2 C. of the secret ingredient squeezed out with love and mix with 1/2 C. Milk.
4. Finally add your powdered sugar and cocoa mixture in small amounts. Once incorporated. Beat or squeeze for 7-10 Minutes. This is a very soft and deliciously moist frosting ~ so probably not the best dessert for an outdoor event, but if you're inside -- preferably in a bathroom, I say eat all you can. Remember to wash your hands, shitsters.
"Heidi-Ho!"
Friday, November 9, 2007
The Joy of Jenkem
11-01-07
Hello shitsters!!, time for an update. I am going into my own business, making Jenkem!! The bottle of shit is on my deck at the moment. All day I let it sit in the hot sun and surprisingly the balloon has actually inflated a little bit. It is kind of standing up and has some gas in it. The shit on the bottom has bubbles floating on it. No pictures though, Fanuci's mom took the camera to Da Crunk's half-brother's prom. Thanks for your support everyone, tomorrow if the balloon is big enough then I'm going to do some jenkem!
11-02-07
Hello Shitsters!! I took some pictures of the progress. The shit on the bottom has seemingly turned to sludge and mixed with some piss to make a layer on the bottom. The layer is softer than just shit, I swished the bottle around and it moved. Above that one there is a layer of dark piss that has some shit in it. There is a steady stream of tiny bubbles moving up from the shit sludge layer through this layer. The balloon on top has inflated more since last night. I put a new label on the bottle because the last one got rained on. The glass inside the bottle has a coating of water from evaporation inside the bottle.
11-03-07
Holy crap!! I finally tried breathing my own SHIT!! No video though, sorry, no camera. I hope you are not too disappointed. But, I wrote a trip report. Today the bubbles had mostly stopped. The balloon had possibly grown a little bit since last time but it was oblong from days in the sun or maybe from the gases inside so it was hard to tell. The shit in the bottle was very settled and did not look like shit anymore even. I first lightly shook the bottle to make sure all of the bubbles had popped. I then pinched off the balloon and took it off of the top. I held that while I huffed from the bottle. After exhaling all air from my lungs I took my straw and inhaled from the inside of the bottle. The flavor of shit struck me, it stuck to the tongue like the flavor of a fine wine. I took some more breaths of that and I waited a few seconds, then inhaled the balloon. The balloon was less tasty, I could barely taste any of my shit and it felt like breathing clean air. After breathing it in I immediately felt that I was passing out. I did not even have time to shit before I became unconscious. When I woke up my shit oozed out of my ass and down my feet. I asked Fanuci how long I was out for. He said for about a minute, and that he had repeatedly tried to wake me but I would not wake up. During this short conversation I began to feel light dissociative effects come over me, accompanied by buzzing in my ears. The feeling got stronger and stronger until I felt like I was in a dream. This was somewhat enjoyable, it made me feel like nothing really mattered. The apathy actually made the rest of the trip more enjoyable. After I was fully into the dream like state visual hallucinations began to start. I had fleeting visions of people who seemed completely random, like Hillary Clinton. I would say something to the person and then he or she would disappear. Normally I would be fearful of trips like this but the dream feeling made it almost fun. Hearing was dulled during the trip, I could only hear what I was saying and some random noises like screeching, Fanuci's "Curly-Talk" and car noises. After the effects wore off Fanuci told me that I was mostly talking in gibberish so I guess I couldn't hear my own voice or anything in the outside world throughout the trip. At the peak of the trip I saw things like pillars in my lawn that disappeared and shapes in the sky. My sense of time was slowed, so the whole trip felt like it was shorter than it was. The comedown was mostly auditory hallucinations, like Three Stooges voices and loud fart-like cracks. The dream like feeling lessened and I drifted back into reality. In the last parts of the trip I became paranoid from the noises because it felt real instead of like a dream. I asked Fanuci how long it had been. He said about 40 minutes. He also told me that I spent long periods of time staring at different spots. I also, according to him, spoke slurred words to trees and rocks. I was very surprised by how messed up the jenkem got me. That was higher than I have ever been. Other drugs distort reality, but jenkem really distorts reality. I was almost completely unaware of my surroundings.
Hello shitsters!!, time for an update. I am going into my own business, making Jenkem!! The bottle of shit is on my deck at the moment. All day I let it sit in the hot sun and surprisingly the balloon has actually inflated a little bit. It is kind of standing up and has some gas in it. The shit on the bottom has bubbles floating on it. No pictures though, Fanuci's mom took the camera to Da Crunk's half-brother's prom. Thanks for your support everyone, tomorrow if the balloon is big enough then I'm going to do some jenkem!
11-02-07
Hello Shitsters!! I took some pictures of the progress. The shit on the bottom has seemingly turned to sludge and mixed with some piss to make a layer on the bottom. The layer is softer than just shit, I swished the bottle around and it moved. Above that one there is a layer of dark piss that has some shit in it. There is a steady stream of tiny bubbles moving up from the shit sludge layer through this layer. The balloon on top has inflated more since last night. I put a new label on the bottle because the last one got rained on. The glass inside the bottle has a coating of water from evaporation inside the bottle.
11-03-07
Holy crap!! I finally tried breathing my own SHIT!! No video though, sorry, no camera. I hope you are not too disappointed. But, I wrote a trip report. Today the bubbles had mostly stopped. The balloon had possibly grown a little bit since last time but it was oblong from days in the sun or maybe from the gases inside so it was hard to tell. The shit in the bottle was very settled and did not look like shit anymore even. I first lightly shook the bottle to make sure all of the bubbles had popped. I then pinched off the balloon and took it off of the top. I held that while I huffed from the bottle. After exhaling all air from my lungs I took my straw and inhaled from the inside of the bottle. The flavor of shit struck me, it stuck to the tongue like the flavor of a fine wine. I took some more breaths of that and I waited a few seconds, then inhaled the balloon. The balloon was less tasty, I could barely taste any of my shit and it felt like breathing clean air. After breathing it in I immediately felt that I was passing out. I did not even have time to shit before I became unconscious. When I woke up my shit oozed out of my ass and down my feet. I asked Fanuci how long I was out for. He said for about a minute, and that he had repeatedly tried to wake me but I would not wake up. During this short conversation I began to feel light dissociative effects come over me, accompanied by buzzing in my ears. The feeling got stronger and stronger until I felt like I was in a dream. This was somewhat enjoyable, it made me feel like nothing really mattered. The apathy actually made the rest of the trip more enjoyable. After I was fully into the dream like state visual hallucinations began to start. I had fleeting visions of people who seemed completely random, like Hillary Clinton. I would say something to the person and then he or she would disappear. Normally I would be fearful of trips like this but the dream feeling made it almost fun. Hearing was dulled during the trip, I could only hear what I was saying and some random noises like screeching, Fanuci's "Curly-Talk" and car noises. After the effects wore off Fanuci told me that I was mostly talking in gibberish so I guess I couldn't hear my own voice or anything in the outside world throughout the trip. At the peak of the trip I saw things like pillars in my lawn that disappeared and shapes in the sky. My sense of time was slowed, so the whole trip felt like it was shorter than it was. The comedown was mostly auditory hallucinations, like Three Stooges voices and loud fart-like cracks. The dream like feeling lessened and I drifted back into reality. In the last parts of the trip I became paranoid from the noises because it felt real instead of like a dream. I asked Fanuci how long it had been. He said about 40 minutes. He also told me that I spent long periods of time staring at different spots. I also, according to him, spoke slurred words to trees and rocks. I was very surprised by how messed up the jenkem got me. That was higher than I have ever been. Other drugs distort reality, but jenkem really distorts reality. I was almost completely unaware of my surroundings.
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